A friend recently told us that he is waking up to the fact that what you think you deserve may not be what you merit, and that it’s a hard lesson to learn.
Although he’s considered successful by almost everyone in his professional and personal life, it was instilled in him early on in his life, and during school, that he deserved the very best. The sky was the limit and he believed it.
Yet as the years went by, he couldn’t break into the six figure salary realm no matter what he did in his career, and his personal life wasn’t free of the challenges that he thought that were beneath him.
In time, as he grew wiser, he realized that his expectations were too high, his income isn’t necessarily a reflection of who he is as a person, and he accepted that what he earns may not equal what he felt he deserved.
Tips to Prevent the Hard Lesson of Finding Out That Getting What You Deserve is Less Than The Best Life Has to Offer
1. Begin to accept that you might very well have exactly what you deserve, at this time. What you think you deserve is your opinion, a completely subjective viewpoint. Set important goals in life, strive every day to achieve them, and know that the journey is often more important than the result.
2. By all means, keep dreaming and dream big, but keep your expectations in check.
The world needs taxi drivers, cooks, construction workers, house-keepers, and other workers. Such professions are as honorable as any other, and your career doesn’t make you more or less equal to anyone; everyone is of the same spiritual essence. How you view your situation can make a significant difference, and in a spiritual sense, things aren’t always as they appear in the mundane world.
For example, someone in a seemingly unimportant job may have an extremely important spiritual role in the lives of people around her. Likewise, someone who society deems a prestigious professional and makes millions per year may be, spiritually speaking, a beginner soul who is not learning his lessons.
3. Accept what you can’t change, but do everything you can to enhance your life and get more of what you want. Develop a detached perspective; do your best to avoid judgment and be grateful for as much as you can in your life.
4. Avoid an excessive sense of entitlement. There is no such thing as inequality. Life is not supposed offer equal outcomes (equal rights and opportunity are another matter).
5. Take glorified inspirational messages in mainstream media and entertainment with a grain of salt, such as the one in the movie “Superman, Man of Steel,” which went something like this: “Superman came to Earth to empower people to rise above all challenges, to become empowered to fulfill their potential and avoid the limits that society places on them.”
Nobody is holding you down, and nobody places limits on you, unless you live in a communist country. Life will always include personal adversity and you have free will to make the most of it.
6. Stop living beyond your means. If you think you deserve the finest life has to offer, you better avoid spending like it unless you have the cash, not credit, to do so. Otherwise, when you find out you don’t deserve the finest life has to offer and lack the cash to pay your bills, you’ll have credit problems.
7. Practice humility, which is spiritual. A humble person never has the shock and disappointment of finding out she’s not the center of the universe, and that she isn’t entitled to what she previously thought.
The good news is that even though you can’t always get what you think you deserve, life becomes more enjoyable when you focus on being grateful for what you have in life instead of what you lack.
Copyright © 2013 Scott Petullo, Stephen Petullo