6 Tips for Couples to Avoid Getting Swept Away by Romantic Illusion

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Most people strive to be part of a happy couple. Unfortunately, the result is often the opposite. Humans learn great lessons, often through difficult times, from love relationships. But if you take a spiritual approach and remember the following tips, you’ll be able to create more happiness and be better equipped to handle rough seas.

When you’re involved with someone, periodically take inventory of your relationship by asking yourself the following questions:

1) Are you allowing this person to be who they are instead of expecting them to be who you want? Do you have many rules for them? Step back and consider which of your expectations are realistic, and which are motivated by a need to control. For example, requiring them to pick up after themselves or be on time is fair. Not allowing them to hang out with whom they want is not. You’re their partner, not their mother or father, and you should want for them what makes them happy (within reason), even if it doesn’t always please you.

2) When was the last time you appreciated this person and felt gratitude for them being in your life? If it’s been awhile, meditate on all the reasons you found this person special in the first place. This can be an exercise of renewal, or of realizing that the bond may have been built on illusion. If the latter, don’t feel bad as it’s very common due to how our society approaches love and relationships. Now you know better.

3) Now may be a good time to reassess your connection and if necessary, take your relationship in a new direction. This is especially true if you and your partner became involved at a young age or have been together for more than a few years. While only the traditional relationship model gains our society’s stamp of approval there are many other forms that may work better for you, your partner, where you both are in life, and where you want to go.

As extreme as it may sound, some people, who already have a solid bond, find that an open relationship can actually improve and enhance their connection. Of course, responsible (safe-sex and honest) non-monogamy, as an alternative to the wildly popular lying, cheating, and unsafe sex approach, is only for those who are mature enough and have moved beyond the old fashioned partnership “ownership” mindset.

It’s important to note that you must both agree upon and want such an arrangement for it to be successful.

4) Have you let yourself go? If so, it’s time to change your diet, exercise regularly, and make the most of your appearance, no matter what your age. If you don’t, is it realistic and fair to expect them to remain physically attracted to only you? Self-improvement subliminal audios can help light a fire under your butt. Yes, you can still be sexy with the excess weight, but it’s bad for your health.

5) How is the energy connection between you two? Has it changed over time? Guilt, resentment, and other fears can dramatically impact a relationship. A forgiveness MP3 audio can help smooth the rough spots.

6) Has the passion between you two become a bit tepid? Good sex is one of the most important parts of a healthy relationship. Turn up the volume with a sex meditation MP3 audio.

Let’s face it. Usually, when it’s over, it’s over. But if your relationship still has life in it, and you both have the desire, you may be surprised how a (seemingly) radical approach can revive and energize your connection.

Copyright © 2011 Scott Petullo, Stephen Petullo

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