Losing a loved one is a heart wrenching experience to say the least.
Although finding the strength to move on with one’s life after such an experience takes time, it can be done.
Gratitude is wonderful for helping to overcome grief. Be grateful for the love you had, the experiences you shared, what you currently have in your life, and what will be in the future.
The closer the connection, the more difficult the separation, but it helps to realize that everyone has more than one soul mate. Some are more compatible than others, but all are meant to enter and leave your life when they do, meaning all relationships appear to be spiritually contracted, including the length of time to be spent together. Expectations of “growing old” with a partner are the norm in our society, but in many cases it’s not meant to be.
As we wrote in our book Your Love Life and Reincarnation, published in 2002, almost all relationships include karmic ties. In other words, one person owes the other, they both owe each other and their connection is necessary for growth and payback, or a similar situation exists. Perhaps there is unfinished business or the two souls agreed, before incarnating, to reunite in order to learn some lessons or accomplish a certain goal.
For someone grieving from the loss of a loved one, we would like to suggest a new outlook. We recommend viewing love interests as opportunities for growth and allowing them to be what they’re meant to be, rather than all or nothing, or assuming they’ll be “the one” for life. Such an outlook eases the difficulty of accepting what is and what is to be, that which you can’t change.
Loss can be devastating, but at least with this perspective, it can be easier to digest when it doesn’t work out as it “should have.” Although that seems to deflate romantic notions of “forever,” know that love really is forever on a spiritual level, not on this physical plane. It’s helpful to view soul progression in lifetimes, not just one existence, as each soul has an agenda that stretches throughout time.
That brings us to the popular phrase, “love of your life.” Perhaps “love of your life so far” or “one of the loves of your life” are much more appropriate since you haven’t lived your entire life and met all the potential love interests yet. This way of thinking does not diminish what you had with past loves since every relationship is different, and you may have a lot to look forward to no matter what your age.
Is a lost love destined? Is feeling a deep sense of loss a natural part of personal fate? We believe so, since the comprehensive astrology and numerology charts clearly indicate unions and separations, among other circumstances. Most experience the loss of love at one time or another. It may be someone they didn’t know that well, someone with whom they were involved for years, or even someone they are still involved with but the spark has died for one or both.
From a spiritual perspective, feeling a sense of loss serves any number of purposes, including, but not limited to the following: it allows you to appreciate more what you had (and will have again); it allows you to experience first-hand the cyclical nature of life; and in some cases, it may even allow you to balance the scales of karma for the loss others experienced due to your actions in the past. But don’t feel guilty over the possibility of past life negative actions as long as you are “doing the right thing” in all situations during this life.
For those who lost a love that may have seemed like “the one,” even though you never had the chance to come together, this type of love loss can also be upsetting, especially if there is a strong past life connection. Perhaps you met and spent time together at work or on vacation. Although the connection has run its course, you still think about the person a lot. However, if you had spent more time together, you may have realized that the person only represented what you wanted or felt you needed in your love life. “What could have been” may have been more of a fantasy. The time spent together was all that was meant to be, for now, maybe, in part, to further establish a link to be continued on a much deeper level the next time around. Remember, the spiritual reasons for the events in your life may seem illogical, and the fated outcome is often at odds with plans, expectations, and hopes.
For those who lost a very compatible and rewarding relationship, past life regression is a great tool to return to a lifetime where you were also together in a loving relationship, and even to a future lifetime (through future progression) when you’ll have the opportunity to love each other again. It will also help to calm your mind and heart to realize this lifetime is just a part of a long tapestry of love.
For those who had to leave a relationship due to dangerous circumstances, such as abuse, alcoholism or drugs, but still cannot seem to let go of the person, cut the spiritual ties that bind. Consciously and visually surround yourself with White Light, cut any cords connecting you and the other person, and fill the empty places where the cords were with White Light. Do this daily until you feel the effects and ask for spiritual help in the process, from whomever you pray to. Let go of them and any anger the best you can. Forgiveness will heal you and help you move on.
Every relationship is different and even though grieving for a lost love isn’t easy, know that there may be a future lover waiting in the wings for a relationship that is even better than you have ever imagined. But dwelling on “what could have been” or your loss will not help to usher in a happier future.
Also know that, based on past life regression research, you have likely loved hundreds of times or more in hundreds, if not thousands (or many more) of past lives. It’s also possible that you will be with that person in a future life, in one way or another, when the timing is better for both of you. In the mean time, let go of this person the best you can. This will not release the memory of them from your life or the possibility of being together again, but remove them as a potential block in your current love life.
Copyright © 2007 Scott Petullo, Stephen Petullo